Ever stay up late at night, like past eight, and watch any of those infomercials disguised as entertainment? HERC has and does as he is a sucker for those Time-Life (now StarVista) collections. On one such late Autumn night in 2008, HERC stumbled upon such a program peddling women's skimpy undergarments to the beat of club music. Genius! About halfway into the hour, they began what HERC calls the PINK portion of the program with an arresting female voice singing:
Four little words just to get me along...
The song went on until stuttering on the word "name" when the models began strutting down the runway. Then the song broke into it's catchy as Velcro chorus:
They call me 'hell'
They call me 'Stacey'They call me 'her'They call me 'Jane'That's not my nameThat's not my nameThat's not my nameThat's not my name
Just after Christmas, with the song still stuck in his head, HERC bought the CD at a reduced price at his local Target - and by local, he means across the street. Fast forward to 2011, around the time school started, HERC's lil' sis fell on some hard times and she and her youngest daughter came to live with HERC and MRS. HERC at The Hideaway. HERC and his youngest niece, K, had only two things in common: both are huge fans of Spongebob Squarepants and music. They could not watch the TV show together because she is legally blind and has to stand six inches from the screen to see effectively blocking anyone else's view in addition to speaking her own dialogue for the on-screen action but if she got her homework done before bath time, her reward was 10-30 minutes to request songs for HERC to play via Spotify, which had just come to America's shores. Sometimes K would take too long to request a song and HERC would "sneak" one in on her. More often than not, she'd reject the song ("No, no, no not that one" she would say disapprovingly) but on one particular day, HERC played "That's Not My Name" and began banging on the Rock Band drum kit sitting in corner of living room. K was drawn to the thunking drum sound and soon took the drumsticks from HERC's hands and began banging on the drum set herself at which time began shouting out girl's names that weren't actually in the song including hers. She'd laugh and giggle and in typical little kid fashion, she wanted to do it again once song was over. So they did. It took almost a year but by the following Summer, HERC's sis was employed again and looking for an apartment. One of HERC's only pleasant memories of K is the time they spent banging on the drum and shouting out boys and girls names before breaking into a chorus of "That's Not My Names" that Summer. K started fifth grade today at the School for the Deaf and Blind so HERC dedicates this one to her.